It’s a few weeks into the semester and for some reason I still don’t have my schedule memorized. I’m only going to, maybe, three of my classes on a regular basis and I feel totally overwhelmed.
In addition to all this, there is one class that I have never gone to all semester. And now that it’s been a few weeks since classes started, it’s pretty much too late to go now. I figure out what the class is – or at least I think I know what the class is – so I go check it out. I have no text book though. I don’t even know what the teacher is talking about. Am I even on his class roster?
I never go back to the class because, well, it’s just too damn awkward. And then come the semester’s close, I get major anxiety that I am going to fail a class.
Then I wake up.
Because this was all just a dream.
I graduated four years ago.
Why the fuck am I still having panic-attack-induced dreams about college?
This isn’t the only recurring dream I have with this issue. I’ve have dreams about high school classes too. I constantly dream about forgetting and/or losing my high school schedule and not knowing what my next class is or where I have to go for it. I have dreams where I haven’t shown up to a specific class (usually science class because… science?) all year. I have dreams about English class… A LOT of dreams about English class… where I either freak out about having to go to class because I didn’t read a book or write a paper. It’s never-ending.
So why am I having these dreams?
I have no fucking idea.
Why are fears I had years ago still ingrained in my mind?
Is it because I was SO afraid of forgetting about classes, tests, and papers back then that the fear sticks with now? Is it because I’m physically a grown up but mentally still a child? Is it because I’m crazy?
Has anyone else had these types of dreams before or am I just straight up nuts?